Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Courtship vs. Dating IV

Once the son has gone to his parents and has gotten their blessing to court the girl they've been praying about then he then calls the girls' dad to set up an appointment to talk to him and his wife about courting their daughter. If they have any doubt in their mind about him or the courtship they should say no, not yet and then continue praying. In our son's case, her parents had already felt it was God's will so they gave their blessing. Once he gets their blessing he tells the girl (or the parents can if they choose to or would rather tell her) that he has their blessing and permission to court her.

At this point the courtship begins. They will meet at either her house (with her parents present at ALL times) or at his house (with his parents present at ALL times). All outside activities will be done with one of the sets of parents accompanying the couple. Chaperoning is not to be left up to the siblings of either the boy or the girl. The parents will be the ones held accountable for how the courtship is handled so they should be the ones with them at all times.

Let me also say that courtship will not work unless both the boy AND the girl AND both sets of parents believe in courtship. If any one of those involved do not support it or believe in it then it will not work. All must be in agreement.

I also believe it is a good idea, once the courtship begins, that all involved (both sets of parents and the couple) sit down and discuss what they expect of each other and of the couple so there is no confusion or misunderstanding. I believe this should be done as soon as possible so someone doesn't allow something that someone else may not agree with. The devil does not like courtship remember, so he will try to get into it and get things messed up. Once that meeting has taken place then everyone knows what to expect.

Courtship should be, can be and will be fun as long as all involved do as they are expected to do. It is up to the parents to keep it fun for the couple. So we parents have our work cut out for us. But I for one am looking forward to it.

1 comment:

J.H said...

sis Julie,
I really like these article and I feel blessed to know about it. Unfortunately, I didn't know anything about it until I read sis. Courtney blog few weeks ago.

As you said, courtship will not work if the parents of both side does not believe in it.
I came from a moslem country with only 1% of the population claiming to be christian. All my life, I knew most of born again believer there are first generation christian. Often it's very hard to get parents permission to go to church (sometimes it involves risking your life, or being thrown out by your family), so don't mention about asking your parent permission to wed a christian guy/woman. I can see there is a big possibility that my son's future in law was not a saved person. So what advice you can give me? So if there is lots of young people with no christian parents (like in my church), who is responsibility is that to act as the parent in courtship?

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